Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
