I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize