what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
