No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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