Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize