they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
