oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
