I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize