What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
