I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
So many bounce houses so little time
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
