I just made out with a guy for $7.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
