Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
