I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
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I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
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Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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