he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
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