I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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