I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
