dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
