Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
