Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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