Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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