It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
