That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Fuck appropriateness.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
