I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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