turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
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I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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