i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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