So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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