She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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