you lied. pity sex is amazing.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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