I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
