it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
