So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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