I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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