she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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