covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
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