a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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