We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize