My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
