I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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