i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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