what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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