the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
