Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
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