I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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