Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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