it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
