just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
