Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
