Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
