Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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