ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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